Greed, fear, or growth?

 

One afternoon about a week ago, my daughter and I were sitting on one of the terrazzo benches/planters along the front esplanade of NALIS’ main library in Port of Spain. We were waiting on someone to arrive, and the munchies got my daughter. She left and returned with a lemon bun and a drink each. I do not like lemon buns, and began to feed mine to two pigeons that were close by. I threw the first piece, and both of them dove for it. Of course, only one got it, but that did not stop ‘pigeon-without-bun’ from trying to wrestle the morsel from his limin’ pardner. I didn’t think anything of this first act, because, that is what most animals do when food is scarcer than mouths. When I threw the second piece of bun, is when I noticed something that made me start to think - the pigeon with the bit of bun in his beak let it go and tried to get the second piece too – and he did! Then I threw a third piece of bun, and both of them stopped fighting for the one they were wrestling over, and headed for piece number three. By then, more pigeons were flying in for the party. I couldn’t tell which two was my first pair, but all the pigeons started rushing each other for the latest piece of bun I threw, almost forgetting the others that were lying on the ground. With more and more bits of bun thrown at them, everyone began to grasp the idea that there was enough for everyone. There was still a little scuttle with each piece I threw, but many of them began to peck at pieces that were just lying there untouched. By this time, my bun was almost finished, and a good thing too, because a great number of pigeons were flying in for the food, and people were beginning to look at me strangely (which, I’ll admit, is nothing new). So I asked my daughter to take a photo for this story (I just had to share my thoughts on this one) before the bun was done. I just had to have a pic to show along with my point. And my point is?

I sat there judging those pigeons harshly (clearly I have nothing to do with my time). What, couldn’t they see that they each could just take the piece of bun it had in its beak and be satisfied with that? Why did they have to leave the piece of bun that was right in front of them, to run after another elusive piece?

Aha! Was I really ‘judging’ pigeons?

I’ve had my fair share of letting go of morsels, figuring that I needed a bigger piece. Sometimes the bigger piece was more material gain, sometimes it was because I craved more autonomy, more freedom to live the way I wanted.

So the big question is, was I being greedy, fearful that I didn’t have enough in my life, or was I letting go of something I needed to in order to gain something better? I guess the answer to these questions can be derived from the ‘how’ I pursued these new morsels. Did I fight anybody for their bit and try to take it away? Did I lose trust in God to take care of me at all times and tried to get more myself? Or was I confident that it was time to let go of something and move on to something else toward my development?

What piece of bun do you have in your beak right now that you’re looking to let go of to run after another morsel? And, what is the motivator for you wanting to let your current morsel go?

Greed, fear, or growth?