Finding the truth

Have you ever set out on a journey of self discovery? Ok, scrap that question, instead, has a journey of self discovery ever set out to find you? These last two weeks have been ‘interesting’ for me, to say the least. To say more, I am discovering a lot about myself – who I am, why I do some of the things I do, my fears, my dreams, my ‘self’ image, my weaknesses, my strengths, my anxieties, and on and on and on.

Yes, I have read and listened to experts on self discovery and have learnt quite a lot from them about dealing with life and living successfully. I thought I had a wealth of theories and opinions and viewpoints at my disposal to get through life in ‘awareness’ mode – until the last two weeks.

Two weeks ago I was pushed into a situation where I began to learn about myself like never before. I had no idea whatsoever that I was entering a life lessons situation. The situation appeared to me as a chance to do my thing in keeping body and soul together financially. It is not a situation that I thought I would get into in a million years, but there I was actively pursuing it. It was only when I was entrenched in it, night after night, that it started to become clearer that I was there for a ‘reason’ beyond what I had initially thought.

So, by now you know I’m not going to say what the situation is (not just yet). However, I will say that more than ever, lately I’ve been thinking a lot about ‘Purpose’ and trying to understand my true purpose in life. It seems this new situation is showing me that to get there, I have to go through my own lessons, not lessons that come from between the covers of a book, or a lecture, or a life coach session. Lessons that I need to learn by being entrenched smack in the middle of a life experience. I need to learn about, and manage, who I am, to get to know why I am on this earth.  This situation is showing me who I am. Revelation is scary, it is painful, it is gut wrenching, but it is the truth.

There is a saying that goes “When the pupil is ready, the teacher will appear” – I think it’s Socrates or Plato or one of them philosopher guys who said it. The thing is, as I try to make some sense as to where I am right now, I realize (when I think back) that I have been for some time, in a space and place that was ripe for growth, and this situation presented itself because I opened up myself to the Universe to intervene and do what it had to do. I was ready, and so, the teacher, my current situation, appeared.

I’m still confused as to the true lessons I have to learn in my new situation, but I am learning to let go and let God (which is one of the lessons I need to learn, actually). All I know is that at the end of this experience, something big (maybe even in a small package) is going to appear in my life. I know whatever it is will take me closer to understanding the truth about why I showed up here on planet earth.

Why are you here, TnT sista? What is your truth?

Charms.